Saturday, October 20, 2012


Ok, so I have to admit, when it comes to politics I am pretty stupid.  Don't get me wrong, I have my strong opinions.  For instance, I am a HUGE fan of the right to choose who you want to marry (same sex or opposite sex) and the right to choose if you want to procreate or not.   I am also a firm believer in giving those people who are fortunate enough to be wealthy, the benefit of tax relief so that they can pour more money into the economy.  I mean, why not?  Let's say your mom stayed late at work one night and ended up making an extra $1,000.00 to spend.  Would you prefer that she buy you something with that money;  benefiting the shop she bought something from and benefiting you at the same time?  Or would you rather go the route of "lets tax her more on that $1,000.00 and then give that amount to Joe Schmoe who feels entitled to that money because he is out of work and feels it's not worth his time to take a low paying job?"

Any way, my real issue is "THE BUDGET."   In all the debates, a common theme is balancing the budget.   Really?  This deficit is trillions of dollars and beyond my comprehension.   Is it an actual reality, of any political party, to really balance this budget?   If the budget is balanced, does that mean that the US has repaid all it's debt to foreign countries and that any country we gave money to has paid us back?  I really just don't get it.

When I think of what a budget is, I think of my family expenses.  I know that I make a certain amount of money every month, and that when it comes to spending my money, I should keep it within the parameters of what I actually earn.  Of course that does not happen, so I use my credit card which would causes my deficit.   Is that how it works when it comes to the United States budget?  If that's the case, what is the actual amount that the US is allowed to spend per month?  Can't someone important hold the check book and if the government tries to spend more money after that monthly surplus has been used, that person just says no?   I mean, I do it with MY kids.    I really need someone to answer me.  What is our allotted amount to make the budget work?

And who is that person who actually reconciles that check book?   Can you imagine checking your account on line and seeing check numbered 2,578,001 for $75.00 and being like "what the heck is that?  It's not written in my check register!  Then shouting around the oval office "who wrote a check for $75.00 and what was it for?"   Or seeing a debit card withdrawal at a gas station in Delaware.  "Biden!  Did you leave Washington and get gas????" " I told you to turn in all of your receipts!"

Let's just fantasize a minute here.   Let's pretend I'm the President.  
*In real life I would never, ever want to be president.  You get called names, you are accused of being a liar when you actually tried your best to make things work.  You do one bad thing in your childhood like smoking pot and all hell breaks lose.  Seriously, to be president, you have to be the kind of kid who didn't even pick your nose because you know that will be held against you.  I enjoy the kind of job that when the day is done I can go home,  handle family matters and then veg out while watching Housewives.

Ok, back to ME being president.    Let's pretend that I'm a fucking genius and I balanced the budget.  HOORAY!  I'm a national hero!   It becomes a holiday and EVERYONE, including retail, gets the day off!  Remember, I'm the genius who did something none of my predecessors ever did.  There will not be amazing sales on this day.  Ok, so I'm so happy that I balanced this  huge checkbook that I decide to take my staff out for dinner and drinks.  What do you mean, I should spend my OWN money?  (I know you never said that,  but it supports my story.)  I'm taking work people out so I'm using the company credit card.  Wait?  I just spent government money!  Does that mean that the budget is no longer balanced??????????  Did I just shoot myself in the foot with my victory celebration?  crap!

In all honesty, why do they even bring up decreasing the National debt on debate?  People don't care about that crap.  They care about either getting goods and services for free (necessities like mobile phone and cigarettes) when they don't work, they care about if their mistresses can get an abortion if an oops was made, and they care if taxes are raised and some idiots care about giving ILLEGAL, yes I said ILLEGAL (as in those who decide the rules to become a citizen here are not applicable to them) immigrants the right to live here off our taxes, send their kids to the free schools and purchase petrolum to blow up our federal buildings.   While I'm on a rant, it's amazing how almost everyone in this country has a platform that they want the government to support, but no one wants taxes raised.  UH DUH, I'm the stupid one and even I know that you can't give money for all these programs / support groups and lower taxes at the same time.    Where's the f'in money gonna come from?  Let me tell you, if a candidate went on tv and said "listen, reducing your taxes just isn't going to happen.  So I'm not going to even waste my breath.  Just live with it and go on.   As the years go on, prices for things will go up and it's just a fact of life so get over it."  I WOULD TOTALLY VOTE FOR HIM.  At least he's not trying to bullshit anyone.  

The next candidate should just say that on behalf of our country,  won't borrow any money, won't charge trips and dinners on the company credit cards, and if we are running low of money, we just say NO to those countries who put their hands out.  If we happen to go past our budget for the month,  then everyone just stays home, eats boxed macaroni and cheese and sucks it up until the next pay day.   Mazel Tov, National debt resolved.