I want my own room.
I want my own room!
I.....WANT....MY...OWN....ROOM!!!!
I have never, ever (well maybe a brief span of time in my 20's) had my own space
Even when I was conceived I had to share the womb with my sister! I'm sure she kicked me and pulled my hair, if I had any, when we were in there too. I know for certain that she bullied me out. How? I came out first, that's how. She probably gave me a big push or kick and forced me out of my mom's birth canal. Then, while I was getting all cleaned up and checked out, she pretty much had seven minutes of alone time with our mother. Totally not fair.
When we got home, we shared a crib for a while. You see, back then in the olden days, doctors didn't participate in full disclosure. My mother was in the dark about having twins until dooms day. Therefore, I had to share MY crib with my sister. How do I know it was my crib and not hers? Well, I was born first, of course. That means I was the "intended" one and she just kind of tagged along like a 3rd wheel.
Once she got her own crib, it was in my room. We shared a room forever! It was awful! Getting yelled at to get out of my own room because she was on the phone. Fighting over whether we slept listening to the radio, tv or nothing. Complaints about breathing too loud. Basically having nowhere to escape. I got my own space at the ripe age of 17. Just in time to go to college and what? Share a dorm room!
I had to share a room with 2 other girls. It was like a jail cell except you were allowed to leave and you had to provide your own meals. Three girls, one closet, one phone (remember, no cell phones back then) and seperate cycles if you know what I mean. Sharing a dorm room wasn't all that terrible..until of course you find out that over break your roommate stole all your Au Coton clothes and didn't pay the phone bill even though you gave her money. And that was the roommate that you got along with.
So then, after college, I spend a few more years alone in my walk in closet, er, bedroom that I did not have to share. Then I go from daddy's house to husband's house. Well, to be fair, husband #1 never came home at night because he was probably out screwing some skank. Sooo, it was kind of like I had my room, but by default. I still shared it..it was ours, per se, his shit was in it. It's not like I could totally call it mine.
Now I share a room with husband #2 (and hopefully he's the final). Love him to death, but want my own room. Top reasons:
1. He farts in bed. I feel like the marital bed is sacred and farts contaminate it. Even after it diffuses. The noise along with the odor is offensive. It should not happen in my room.
2. He makes fun of the shows I watch. Hey, If I wanted commentary I would have watched it in the "common areas" of our house like the living room. If I had my own bedroom, what I watched would be my prerogative and I would not have to defend my poor decisions.
3. Another tv issue..if I'm lying in bed "watching tv", (sometimes I watch tv with my eyes closed and not even facing the television), he feels he has carte blanche to change the channel. Bullshit. Whether I am watching it by staring at it or just listening, if I was in there first, it's my call.
4. His mess is my mess. Clothes on the floor, disorganized stuff on the dresser. I was never such a slob until I got married and shared a room.
Somehow my bedroom has also become a dumping ground for my kids' stuff. Before I go into bed, I have to pull up the covers and examine for Barbie dolls, stuffed animals, head bands and miscellaneous toys. Or else I end up crawling into bed and then discovering these items under my back or at my feet.
My kids have a room in the house designated solely for their play. Toys, tv, no furniture other than a little princess table. They also have their bedrooms. We have a living room that we all share. We have an office that basically my husband uses. Where do I go when I need to hide? Where is my play room? Why can't I have a place that I don't have to share??? Waaahhhh!!!! I want my own room!!!
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Bully.
There has been a lot of attention in the media these days about kids bullying kids in school. Some of the victims of bullying are going to extreme measures to avoid being bullied by killing themselves. This is disgusting and heart breaking. Schools and other organizations are brainstorming to find ways to send a message that kids should be more compassionate and to be more excepting of peoples' differences.
Hate to say this but: IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN. What's that old saying? A tiger doesn't change his stripes? Adults are always trying to change the behavior of kids when the adults themselves do not display the same behavior. For example, let's say that you invited Johnny Jr's. friend, over for a playdate. Johnny Jr's. friend is playing with Johnny's favorite toy. Johnny is not too pleased about that and rips it out of his hands. You try to diffuse the situation and make nice by saying, "Now Johnny, you must share your toys. It's rude not to let him play with it". Now, let's say the friend's mother returns to bring her kid home and she sees your cherry red 1963 Corvette (I know, they didn't have Cherry Red back then, but this is about principle and not details). She mentions that she would like to "play" with your Corvette and can she take it for a ride? Will you follow your own advice that it's rude to not share? Probably not. I know this isn't on the same level as bullying but I'm making the point of expecting children to behave differently from what they are actually taught by example.
I witness adult bullying all the time: Parents bullying coaches. The person tailgating you while you are driving the in the slow lane. Idiots shopping at the mall around Christmas time.
The only way to cure bullying is to teach your children to be prepared for it. Let's just say, IT WORKED FOR ME! Picture this: growing up I had huge boobies, zits on my face, unruly hair. Ok, that's just the physical. Inside I was shy, introverted and very emotional. I know, I sound like a prize, right? I was picked on constantly! Who do you think the predators were? Good looking classmates? Peers who were more confident and social? Nooooo. It was my own siblings! They tormented me! If my parents had established anti bullying and no tolerance laws I would be an only child by now! When I was a child, I cried All..The..Time. Then, my siblings would make fun of me for crying and I would cry even more!!!!! Bullying at home does not sound like the most kind and rewarding thing to do. However, when I was older I didn't get offended by mean comments made by others. I didn't freak out when the boys called me Dolly Parton. My skin had already been made thick. Compare bullying to driving. You can't control the stupid drivers, but you can learn to avoid accidents by learning how to drive defensively.
Moral of the story: You can't stop people from being assholes. Kids don't have the cognitive ability to realize cause and effect and they don't realize what it might do to the victim over time. Let's stop the nonsense of kids killing themselves because peers bully them! Bully your kids or siblings at home and get them prepared for the real world!
Hate to say this but: IT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN. What's that old saying? A tiger doesn't change his stripes? Adults are always trying to change the behavior of kids when the adults themselves do not display the same behavior. For example, let's say that you invited Johnny Jr's. friend, over for a playdate. Johnny Jr's. friend is playing with Johnny's favorite toy. Johnny is not too pleased about that and rips it out of his hands. You try to diffuse the situation and make nice by saying, "Now Johnny, you must share your toys. It's rude not to let him play with it". Now, let's say the friend's mother returns to bring her kid home and she sees your cherry red 1963 Corvette (I know, they didn't have Cherry Red back then, but this is about principle and not details). She mentions that she would like to "play" with your Corvette and can she take it for a ride? Will you follow your own advice that it's rude to not share? Probably not. I know this isn't on the same level as bullying but I'm making the point of expecting children to behave differently from what they are actually taught by example.
I witness adult bullying all the time: Parents bullying coaches. The person tailgating you while you are driving the in the slow lane. Idiots shopping at the mall around Christmas time.
The only way to cure bullying is to teach your children to be prepared for it. Let's just say, IT WORKED FOR ME! Picture this: growing up I had huge boobies, zits on my face, unruly hair. Ok, that's just the physical. Inside I was shy, introverted and very emotional. I know, I sound like a prize, right? I was picked on constantly! Who do you think the predators were? Good looking classmates? Peers who were more confident and social? Nooooo. It was my own siblings! They tormented me! If my parents had established anti bullying and no tolerance laws I would be an only child by now! When I was a child, I cried All..The..Time. Then, my siblings would make fun of me for crying and I would cry even more!!!!! Bullying at home does not sound like the most kind and rewarding thing to do. However, when I was older I didn't get offended by mean comments made by others. I didn't freak out when the boys called me Dolly Parton. My skin had already been made thick. Compare bullying to driving. You can't control the stupid drivers, but you can learn to avoid accidents by learning how to drive defensively.
Moral of the story: You can't stop people from being assholes. Kids don't have the cognitive ability to realize cause and effect and they don't realize what it might do to the victim over time. Let's stop the nonsense of kids killing themselves because peers bully them! Bully your kids or siblings at home and get them prepared for the real world!
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Smokin
The only time people are genuinely happy to see a smoker is when they need a match. Have you ever gone to a birthday party and there's no match to light the candles? That's when the host walks around with a big smile on her face and asks, "Do you smoke?" Normally the host would be annoyed at a smoker but this time she has a sparkle in her eye, a glimmer of hope that someone's gross habit can benefit her.
Truly, this is NOT a lecture on smoking. I could not care less if someone is a smoker. In my opinion, it's your body, you do what you wish with it. Even if the decision is a stupid one, it's your decision, your body and only you pay the consequences. Wanna smoke crack? Inhale glue? Add piercings or ink to your skin? Hit yourself in the head with a frying pan? Go on ahead!!! Do it to yourself. What do I care? To be honest, if cigarettes tasted like chocolate cake or an apple martini, I would be all over it. (Any marketers out there...you might want to pick up on this tip).
The one thing I absolutely hate about people who smoke is that they are litter bugs!!! Ok, like smoking isn't gross enough but do you have to drop your ashes and the butt of the cigarette wherever you happen to be? I was at the beach, alone for once and I relished in the tranquility. I was sitting in my beach chair, eyes closed, fingers grazing the sand. Aaaaaahhhh. But then, ICK! Fucking ICK! While combing my fingers through the sand I grabbed someone's finished cigarette. I wanted to vomit!!! It totally ruined my zen mood. It's just disgusting. Do I know where this person's mouth has been? What kind of germs am I going to get by touching this person's saliva? Even more so, why can't this smoker get off of his or her ASS and throw the butt in the garbage? Then I even made myself more nauseous by convincing myself that I was not only combing my fingers through the sand but through cigarette ashes too.
Let's just say I have a habit too. Not not a terribly harmful one, but I'm addicted nonetheless. For the sake of this argument, let's say my habit is picking my nose (wink, wink). Is it disgusting? Yes. Will it harm me? I'm sure eventually it will. Here are the effects of nose picking:
You can open the door to bacteria and infections. Avid nose-pickers may see more pimples in and around the nose due to increased oil deposits from the fingers. For a very small minority of the nostril-inclined, the consequences of their behavior have been nothing to sneeze at. You can brake a blood vessel that require cauterization (a burning process that deadens tissue) to halt the bleeding that resulted.
Now, nose picking is not as controversial as smoking but imagine if I'm a flicker. When I'm done with my booger, what if I decide to just leave it anywhere, like a smoker would do with his ashes or butt. What if leave it on a stair railing and you touch it? That's like vomit level of gross, right? What if I flick it and it accidentally lands on you? Ewww, I'm shivering with the thought. And even worse, but kind of serious, what if I pick, draw blood or not draw blood and then open a public door without washing or sanitizing my hand? ..And you're the person who touches that door handle right after me!!!! Now do you see my point?
How about a less serious issue. My habit now is chewing gum. I open the wrapper, and if I take the route of a smoker, I will throw the wrapper on the ground. Why? Because I'm done with it, that's why. That's what smokers do. They throw their trash on the ground. Then I chew. Now I'm done with the gum. Should I go out of my way to find a safe way to dispose it? No, I'm following the footsteps of a smoker. I throw it down, that's most convenient for me. Do I care if someone steps in it and tracks it with them? Not really. It's not my gum anymore so I don't really care what happens next.
Same goes for smokers. What do they think happens with their ashes and butts when they are done? Just because THEY are finished,doesn't mean it just goes away. People walk through their smoke (because they HAVE to stand in front of the doorway) and take home the smell with them. People walk through their ashes and bring it via soles into their car and homes.
I'm sure I'll hear shit from smokers...and I say go ahead! Leave a comment! I would love to hear your point a view (click on the comment button below if you dare). All I ask is that if you are going to destroy your lives, go ahead, just BUTT out of mine. And give hoot, don't pollute.
Truly, this is NOT a lecture on smoking. I could not care less if someone is a smoker. In my opinion, it's your body, you do what you wish with it. Even if the decision is a stupid one, it's your decision, your body and only you pay the consequences. Wanna smoke crack? Inhale glue? Add piercings or ink to your skin? Hit yourself in the head with a frying pan? Go on ahead!!! Do it to yourself. What do I care? To be honest, if cigarettes tasted like chocolate cake or an apple martini, I would be all over it. (Any marketers out there...you might want to pick up on this tip).
The one thing I absolutely hate about people who smoke is that they are litter bugs!!! Ok, like smoking isn't gross enough but do you have to drop your ashes and the butt of the cigarette wherever you happen to be? I was at the beach, alone for once and I relished in the tranquility. I was sitting in my beach chair, eyes closed, fingers grazing the sand. Aaaaaahhhh. But then, ICK! Fucking ICK! While combing my fingers through the sand I grabbed someone's finished cigarette. I wanted to vomit!!! It totally ruined my zen mood. It's just disgusting. Do I know where this person's mouth has been? What kind of germs am I going to get by touching this person's saliva? Even more so, why can't this smoker get off of his or her ASS and throw the butt in the garbage? Then I even made myself more nauseous by convincing myself that I was not only combing my fingers through the sand but through cigarette ashes too.
Let's just say I have a habit too. Not not a terribly harmful one, but I'm addicted nonetheless. For the sake of this argument, let's say my habit is picking my nose (wink, wink). Is it disgusting? Yes. Will it harm me? I'm sure eventually it will. Here are the effects of nose picking:
You can open the door to bacteria and infections. Avid nose-pickers may see more pimples in and around the nose due to increased oil deposits from the fingers. For a very small minority of the nostril-inclined, the consequences of their behavior have been nothing to sneeze at. You can brake a blood vessel that require cauterization (a burning process that deadens tissue) to halt the bleeding that resulted.
Now, nose picking is not as controversial as smoking but imagine if I'm a flicker. When I'm done with my booger, what if I decide to just leave it anywhere, like a smoker would do with his ashes or butt. What if leave it on a stair railing and you touch it? That's like vomit level of gross, right? What if I flick it and it accidentally lands on you? Ewww, I'm shivering with the thought. And even worse, but kind of serious, what if I pick, draw blood or not draw blood and then open a public door without washing or sanitizing my hand? ..And you're the person who touches that door handle right after me!!!! Now do you see my point?
How about a less serious issue. My habit now is chewing gum. I open the wrapper, and if I take the route of a smoker, I will throw the wrapper on the ground. Why? Because I'm done with it, that's why. That's what smokers do. They throw their trash on the ground. Then I chew. Now I'm done with the gum. Should I go out of my way to find a safe way to dispose it? No, I'm following the footsteps of a smoker. I throw it down, that's most convenient for me. Do I care if someone steps in it and tracks it with them? Not really. It's not my gum anymore so I don't really care what happens next.
Same goes for smokers. What do they think happens with their ashes and butts when they are done? Just because THEY are finished,doesn't mean it just goes away. People walk through their smoke (because they HAVE to stand in front of the doorway) and take home the smell with them. People walk through their ashes and bring it via soles into their car and homes.
I'm sure I'll hear shit from smokers...and I say go ahead! Leave a comment! I would love to hear your point a view (click on the comment button below if you dare). All I ask is that if you are going to destroy your lives, go ahead, just BUTT out of mine. And give hoot, don't pollute.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Generation Cry Baby
Lately, society has been giving titles to generations. "Generation X" "Generation Y". I do not know where they originate from but I have dubbed the new generation:
WELCOME TO GENERATION CRY BABY!
Today's PARENTS are such friggin cry babies and our current legislation keeps coming up with ways to change the laws so that no one is offended. How is our future generation going to be tough enough to fight in the military or to hold prestigious positions? The parents of today would rather cry and sue over mundane issues than teach their children a life lesson. It's really quite annoying. Here are some examples that drive me absolutely bananas:
Let's start with T-ball, soccer, etc.: EVERYBODY GETS A TROPHY???????? Give me a fucking break! You win the game, you get a trophy. Loser either cries and gets over it or just enjoys the game and goes home. But because some kids whine when they get home after losing...and the parents don't want to hear it..now the losers get trophies too. I totally blame the parents. I have played numerous games of Candy Land with my daughter. She seriously flips out when she does not get the ice cream card. So I give her a choice. She can continue with the game, have fun and see how it turns out. The result will be the same. If she wins she gets nothing and if she loses she gets nothing. OR, she can go in her room and play by herself, because if she continues this behavior she will not have any friends to play with and she will have to become accustomed to being by herself. What does giving trophies to everybody teach our children? It teaches them to be self entitled. They will believe they are entitled to money, promotions and awards that they didn't earn. This is a huge disservice. Why would they bother trying hard or striving for success? By the way, have you ever seen the losers of the Super Bowl get a ring? I haven't.
NOW PARENTS ARE SUING SCHOOLS??????? Absolutely ridiculous! I recently read a story in the paper about a parent who is suing the school because the teacher did not hang their daughter's essay on the wall along with the other students'. The teacher explained that the task was to write an essay about your summer vacation and what you did. Instead, the student wrote about her mother being sick. Is that following directions????? The parent's irrational response was to threaten to sue the school. A bit of an overreaction, don't you think? The better response would have been to review the assignment with their daughter and suggest she follow the instructions, maybe re-do the assignment to comply with what was requested. But parents of today can not accept blame, cannot accept their child has a flaw, even if was as temporary as not following the rules..and cannot discipline their children in order to guide them to their future.
NO PEANUT BUTTER IN THE SCHOOL: I have a funny feeling that I am going to surprise you all but I agree with the school (and no, I don't have children with allergies). A few years ago, in my hometown, a notice went out to parents of a school explaining that a girl who is highly allergic to peanut products will be enrolled. Her parents and the school would like the cooperation of everybody to not bring peanut butter into the school. The school would also be making accommodations by having the child sit at a "special" table in the cafeteria. Is not being allowed to bring peanut products to school inconvenient? Yes. Is it unfair to students who don't have peanut allergies and really like to eat peanut butter sandwiches? Perhaps. But the reaction that the school got from the parents was absolutely ridiculous!! Instead of keeping in mind that this girl could die, YES, DIE, from being in contact with peanut products, they focused on how upset their precious child will be if they can't have their peanut butter sandwich. Plus, it's so much easier for the parents to just slap together peanut butter on bread. Wouldn't this be the perfect opportunity to have your child open their minds to different lunches? Is it really that hard to make cream cheese and jelly instead of peanut butter and jelly? What about a turkey sandwich? It's so easy: bread, turkey, maybe cheese mustard or mayo. Not any extra steps than peanut butter. Better yet how about using this event to teach your children a little compassion? Wouldn't it be a great idea if instead of parents crying that their family is slightly inconvenienced they stress the importance of a human life over a sandwich??? Children on Generation Cry Baby will grow up valuing food and convenience over humanity.
I think the Crybaby Generation started with the act of being politically correct. This practice of being politically correct has gone completely overboard! The original intent was to eliminate prejudices but now it has gone so far that people can't say anything without the fear of insulting someone. For instance, lets use race as an example. Apparently now using the description "Oriental" is offensive. Why??? I don't get it. If a person appears to be from the Orient region of Asia..why not use it as a descriptive term? Instead, the term,"Asian", is preferred. But Asian is more broad and covers more countries. If I am trying to describe a mugger to a police sketch artist and I say "Asian", he/she wouldn't know whether to draw the picture as a Chinese person or a person from India or Israel. But if I say "Oriental" he can assume that the person has a slant to his eyes, right? Another thing, how the heck am I supposed to look at someone and decide if he or she is African American???????? A person can be white and be African American...or a person can be black, but his/her ancestors as far back as great grandparents can be from United States. I certainly don't expect people to look at ME and try to find the politically correct description. If they did that with my child, they would be politically INCORRECT in saying "Caucasian". That would be offensive, according to the current rules. They would have to use psychic skills to come up with the true identity of Polish, Italian, Russian, Hungarian (I could go on) American. These Generation Crybaby'ers are going to drive us insane trying to figure out what we can and cannot call each other. How about this instead: I call it like I see it, and if I'm seeing it wrong, correct me. That should be what being politically correct really correct means.
Would you believe that the term "Gifted Child" has been made politically incorrect by Generation Crybabies????? What? That's a fucking compliment! And if my child was gifted, I would be shouting it! But instead, the correct term is "Advanced Learner". Seriously, a rose by any other name......? I believe that this is not geared towards the "Advanced Learners" but more likely, the Crybabies whose children are not gifted were offended and jealous and put up a friggin stink about it! Does changing the name make their kids any smarter??? Uh, that would be a big fat NO. Why don't they focus on spending time with their children, teaching their children, taking away the video games and constant television and make their child use their imagination...then THEY can call their own child gifted.
Ok, I'm about to hop off my soap box here. So this post was more venting than funny..but hopefully this cycle of Crybabyies will end!!!! I fear for my children's future when children of Crybabies lead the world. This country won't be protected because we don't want to offend our enemies. The world will be made up of slackers because why should anyone strive for success when awards will be doled out to everyone regardless of achievement? And there will be an island for people with peanut allergies as not to inconvenience the rest of us without this terrible hardship. Perhaps I'll be dead by then and miss it all. If I'm lucky.
WELCOME TO GENERATION CRY BABY!
Today's PARENTS are such friggin cry babies and our current legislation keeps coming up with ways to change the laws so that no one is offended. How is our future generation going to be tough enough to fight in the military or to hold prestigious positions? The parents of today would rather cry and sue over mundane issues than teach their children a life lesson. It's really quite annoying. Here are some examples that drive me absolutely bananas:
Let's start with T-ball, soccer, etc.: EVERYBODY GETS A TROPHY???????? Give me a fucking break! You win the game, you get a trophy. Loser either cries and gets over it or just enjoys the game and goes home. But because some kids whine when they get home after losing...and the parents don't want to hear it..now the losers get trophies too. I totally blame the parents. I have played numerous games of Candy Land with my daughter. She seriously flips out when she does not get the ice cream card. So I give her a choice. She can continue with the game, have fun and see how it turns out. The result will be the same. If she wins she gets nothing and if she loses she gets nothing. OR, she can go in her room and play by herself, because if she continues this behavior she will not have any friends to play with and she will have to become accustomed to being by herself. What does giving trophies to everybody teach our children? It teaches them to be self entitled. They will believe they are entitled to money, promotions and awards that they didn't earn. This is a huge disservice. Why would they bother trying hard or striving for success? By the way, have you ever seen the losers of the Super Bowl get a ring? I haven't.
NOW PARENTS ARE SUING SCHOOLS??????? Absolutely ridiculous! I recently read a story in the paper about a parent who is suing the school because the teacher did not hang their daughter's essay on the wall along with the other students'. The teacher explained that the task was to write an essay about your summer vacation and what you did. Instead, the student wrote about her mother being sick. Is that following directions????? The parent's irrational response was to threaten to sue the school. A bit of an overreaction, don't you think? The better response would have been to review the assignment with their daughter and suggest she follow the instructions, maybe re-do the assignment to comply with what was requested. But parents of today can not accept blame, cannot accept their child has a flaw, even if was as temporary as not following the rules..and cannot discipline their children in order to guide them to their future.
NO PEANUT BUTTER IN THE SCHOOL: I have a funny feeling that I am going to surprise you all but I agree with the school (and no, I don't have children with allergies). A few years ago, in my hometown, a notice went out to parents of a school explaining that a girl who is highly allergic to peanut products will be enrolled. Her parents and the school would like the cooperation of everybody to not bring peanut butter into the school. The school would also be making accommodations by having the child sit at a "special" table in the cafeteria. Is not being allowed to bring peanut products to school inconvenient? Yes. Is it unfair to students who don't have peanut allergies and really like to eat peanut butter sandwiches? Perhaps. But the reaction that the school got from the parents was absolutely ridiculous!! Instead of keeping in mind that this girl could die, YES, DIE, from being in contact with peanut products, they focused on how upset their precious child will be if they can't have their peanut butter sandwich. Plus, it's so much easier for the parents to just slap together peanut butter on bread. Wouldn't this be the perfect opportunity to have your child open their minds to different lunches? Is it really that hard to make cream cheese and jelly instead of peanut butter and jelly? What about a turkey sandwich? It's so easy: bread, turkey, maybe cheese mustard or mayo. Not any extra steps than peanut butter. Better yet how about using this event to teach your children a little compassion? Wouldn't it be a great idea if instead of parents crying that their family is slightly inconvenienced they stress the importance of a human life over a sandwich??? Children on Generation Cry Baby will grow up valuing food and convenience over humanity.
I think the Crybaby Generation started with the act of being politically correct. This practice of being politically correct has gone completely overboard! The original intent was to eliminate prejudices but now it has gone so far that people can't say anything without the fear of insulting someone. For instance, lets use race as an example. Apparently now using the description "Oriental" is offensive. Why??? I don't get it. If a person appears to be from the Orient region of Asia..why not use it as a descriptive term? Instead, the term,"Asian", is preferred. But Asian is more broad and covers more countries. If I am trying to describe a mugger to a police sketch artist and I say "Asian", he/she wouldn't know whether to draw the picture as a Chinese person or a person from India or Israel. But if I say "Oriental" he can assume that the person has a slant to his eyes, right? Another thing, how the heck am I supposed to look at someone and decide if he or she is African American???????? A person can be white and be African American...or a person can be black, but his/her ancestors as far back as great grandparents can be from United States. I certainly don't expect people to look at ME and try to find the politically correct description. If they did that with my child, they would be politically INCORRECT in saying "Caucasian". That would be offensive, according to the current rules. They would have to use psychic skills to come up with the true identity of Polish, Italian, Russian, Hungarian (I could go on) American. These Generation Crybaby'ers are going to drive us insane trying to figure out what we can and cannot call each other. How about this instead: I call it like I see it, and if I'm seeing it wrong, correct me. That should be what being politically correct really correct means.
Would you believe that the term "Gifted Child" has been made politically incorrect by Generation Crybabies????? What? That's a fucking compliment! And if my child was gifted, I would be shouting it! But instead, the correct term is "Advanced Learner". Seriously, a rose by any other name......? I believe that this is not geared towards the "Advanced Learners" but more likely, the Crybabies whose children are not gifted were offended and jealous and put up a friggin stink about it! Does changing the name make their kids any smarter??? Uh, that would be a big fat NO. Why don't they focus on spending time with their children, teaching their children, taking away the video games and constant television and make their child use their imagination...then THEY can call their own child gifted.
Ok, I'm about to hop off my soap box here. So this post was more venting than funny..but hopefully this cycle of Crybabyies will end!!!! I fear for my children's future when children of Crybabies lead the world. This country won't be protected because we don't want to offend our enemies. The world will be made up of slackers because why should anyone strive for success when awards will be doled out to everyone regardless of achievement? And there will be an island for people with peanut allergies as not to inconvenience the rest of us without this terrible hardship. Perhaps I'll be dead by then and miss it all. If I'm lucky.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
I'm Done, Period!
I think at a certain age you should be able to elect to stop your period. I have now had my period for thirty years. YES, I SAID 30 YEARS! That is a looong time. Longer than any relationship I have ever had. I'm done having kids, there is absolutely no good reason why I should be ovulating. How about women who decide earlier on in life that they don't want children? Shouldn't they have the option to not have this monthly inconvenience?
I remember the day I got it. Just so happens it was my mother's birthday, that's why I remember the date. We had just returned home from our dinner out, I went to the bathroom and there it was. Ugh! Let the nightmare begin. So I tell my mom and instead of her being helpful or concerned or even sympathetic..what does she do? She slaps me across the face! What the fuck? Since when does bleeding from the vagina warrant getting slapped? It's not like I wiped it on her towels or something. Turns out it's some funky kind of tradition. Let me tell you, the tradition ended then! I will not be passing that one down to my girls. Before I knew it was a tradition, I just thought my mom was mad at me, perhaps for inconveniencing her, especially on her birthday. It's not like my mother ever had logical reasons for her outbursts before this happened. From then on when I got my period I was afraid to tell her. I didn't want to get slapped again. Thank goodness I have a sister who is ten years older than me. At least I could go down to her bathroom and steal her stash of pads. (Yes, Nancy, that's where they disappeared to).
Men don't think periods are such a big deal and wonder why we get cranky. Well, let me tell you, if men bled from their penises once a month, there would be legislation that they can get paid time off from work. It might even be considered a disability. Have you seen how they get when they have a cold or stomach ache? I bet they couldn't even handle it.
One of the benefits of electing to stop your period is not having to buy the paraphernalia. When people find out you are pregnant, they always make the same stupid joke "Better save up for diapers, you're gonna need them. Heh heh". Yeah, real funny and original-NOT. But when you first get your period, nobody says "Better save up for some sanitary napkins and tampons - you're gonna need it, Heh Heh". Meanwhile I have two kids and I only bought diapers for a total of about 3 years, and that's cumulative. I have been buying period supplies, which included Mydol and wine for 30 years! (Well, not the wine). That is just freaking nuts. Imagine how much money I have spent on it all these years. I'm sure it's more than my current salary. I'm actually glad that I was born when I was born though. Imagine the "olden days" when women had to wear that belt contraption? I would just die. I have also always wondered what do women in third world countries do? I mean, they must be able menstruate because they keep having kids..but they don't even wear clothes. Do they roll up a leaf or use the hair from a furry animal? Do they just let it drip down their leg? How come sociologists never do a documentary on this? I really want to know but I'm not getting a bazillion inoculations to go there and find out.
Another benefit of stopping your period is that you can actually plan a vacation, for whenever you want..not just try to figure out 4 months in advance if your going to have it the weekend you want to go away. I know some people are thinking, "What's the big deal if you have your period while on vacation?" Well, to me it is a big deal. I don't want to keep getting off the beach to change, I don't want to worry about drippage and I certainly don't want to be bloated. And forget hotel sex, that's NOT happening if I'm on the rag. Plus I have a unique issue. I'm pretty sure I mentioned this in one of my previous posts, but I'm too lazy to look so I'll just say it again. My daughter ruined my vagina. She came out at lightening speed. My first contraction was at 8:10 and she was born at 8:50. So fast that even the blood vessel in her eyes popped. Since then I have trouble keeping in tampons! If I sneeze, cough, laugh or even fart it falls out!! So if I'm on vacation while I have my period and I'm on the beach, I just have to make sure I don't do any of those things or else I'll be in the bathroom every ten minutes.
If I can elect to stop getting my period, I can also stop taking birth control. Let me tell you, not only is it expensive but it can kill you too! My friend Lori recently told me that she got pancreatice from taking a certain type of birth control. Damn! That seems not only painful, but pretty inconvenient for a stay at home mom. Who watches the kids while you're doubled over in pain on the floor? I copied and pasted the side effects of this particular birth control from their own website: leukorrhea, diarrhea, vomiting, vaginitis, flu syndrome, moniliasis, allergic reaction, cystitis, tooth disorder, sore throat, infection, fever, surgery, back pain, migraine, dyspepsia, rhinitis, acne, gastroenteritis, bronchitis, pharyngitis, skin disorder, intermenstrual bleeding, decreased libido, pain, increased cough, dizziness, pain in extremity, and pelvic pain.
Sounds like fun, doesn't it? All this to regulate your period and have the chance of not getting pregnant. I told Lori to quit birth control and tell her husband that she has headache instead. I would much rather go to the hospital, have surgery to stop my period and deal with the hot flashes and mood swings (which according to my husband I possess anyway). Oh, and speaking of birth control, have you ever seen the commercial for that birth control where it promotes not getting your period for several months? That totally scares me!!! I know, here I am complaining about having it, but I can't imagine altering my body where it only comes every few months. What does that say for PMS? (PRE-Menstrual Syndrome). Do you end up having all this pent up anger and emotion until 3 months later when you actually do get your period? At least each month you get to unleash. I'm sure when the time comes, the user of this birth control just EXPLODES!!!! On the defense of having your period monthly, at least it's a quiet or quieter storm rather than a friggin tornado destroying everything in site.
It's obvious that I am terribly annoyed and inconvenienced with having my period. But I have to say..some of the worst days of my life have been when I went to the bathroom and said to myself "SHIT, I don't have my period yet!??!"
I remember the day I got it. Just so happens it was my mother's birthday, that's why I remember the date. We had just returned home from our dinner out, I went to the bathroom and there it was. Ugh! Let the nightmare begin. So I tell my mom and instead of her being helpful or concerned or even sympathetic..what does she do? She slaps me across the face! What the fuck? Since when does bleeding from the vagina warrant getting slapped? It's not like I wiped it on her towels or something. Turns out it's some funky kind of tradition. Let me tell you, the tradition ended then! I will not be passing that one down to my girls. Before I knew it was a tradition, I just thought my mom was mad at me, perhaps for inconveniencing her, especially on her birthday. It's not like my mother ever had logical reasons for her outbursts before this happened. From then on when I got my period I was afraid to tell her. I didn't want to get slapped again. Thank goodness I have a sister who is ten years older than me. At least I could go down to her bathroom and steal her stash of pads. (Yes, Nancy, that's where they disappeared to).
Men don't think periods are such a big deal and wonder why we get cranky. Well, let me tell you, if men bled from their penises once a month, there would be legislation that they can get paid time off from work. It might even be considered a disability. Have you seen how they get when they have a cold or stomach ache? I bet they couldn't even handle it.
One of the benefits of electing to stop your period is not having to buy the paraphernalia. When people find out you are pregnant, they always make the same stupid joke "Better save up for diapers, you're gonna need them. Heh heh". Yeah, real funny and original-NOT. But when you first get your period, nobody says "Better save up for some sanitary napkins and tampons - you're gonna need it, Heh Heh". Meanwhile I have two kids and I only bought diapers for a total of about 3 years, and that's cumulative. I have been buying period supplies, which included Mydol and wine for 30 years! (Well, not the wine). That is just freaking nuts. Imagine how much money I have spent on it all these years. I'm sure it's more than my current salary. I'm actually glad that I was born when I was born though. Imagine the "olden days" when women had to wear that belt contraption? I would just die. I have also always wondered what do women in third world countries do? I mean, they must be able menstruate because they keep having kids..but they don't even wear clothes. Do they roll up a leaf or use the hair from a furry animal? Do they just let it drip down their leg? How come sociologists never do a documentary on this? I really want to know but I'm not getting a bazillion inoculations to go there and find out.
Another benefit of stopping your period is that you can actually plan a vacation, for whenever you want..not just try to figure out 4 months in advance if your going to have it the weekend you want to go away. I know some people are thinking, "What's the big deal if you have your period while on vacation?" Well, to me it is a big deal. I don't want to keep getting off the beach to change, I don't want to worry about drippage and I certainly don't want to be bloated. And forget hotel sex, that's NOT happening if I'm on the rag. Plus I have a unique issue. I'm pretty sure I mentioned this in one of my previous posts, but I'm too lazy to look so I'll just say it again. My daughter ruined my vagina. She came out at lightening speed. My first contraction was at 8:10 and she was born at 8:50. So fast that even the blood vessel in her eyes popped. Since then I have trouble keeping in tampons! If I sneeze, cough, laugh or even fart it falls out!! So if I'm on vacation while I have my period and I'm on the beach, I just have to make sure I don't do any of those things or else I'll be in the bathroom every ten minutes.
If I can elect to stop getting my period, I can also stop taking birth control. Let me tell you, not only is it expensive but it can kill you too! My friend Lori recently told me that she got pancreatice from taking a certain type of birth control. Damn! That seems not only painful, but pretty inconvenient for a stay at home mom. Who watches the kids while you're doubled over in pain on the floor? I copied and pasted the side effects of this particular birth control from their own website: leukorrhea, diarrhea, vomiting, vaginitis, flu syndrome, moniliasis, allergic reaction, cystitis, tooth disorder, sore throat, infection, fever, surgery, back pain, migraine, dyspepsia, rhinitis, acne, gastroenteritis, bronchitis, pharyngitis, skin disorder, intermenstrual bleeding, decreased libido, pain, increased cough, dizziness, pain in extremity, and pelvic pain.
Sounds like fun, doesn't it? All this to regulate your period and have the chance of not getting pregnant. I told Lori to quit birth control and tell her husband that she has headache instead. I would much rather go to the hospital, have surgery to stop my period and deal with the hot flashes and mood swings (which according to my husband I possess anyway). Oh, and speaking of birth control, have you ever seen the commercial for that birth control where it promotes not getting your period for several months? That totally scares me!!! I know, here I am complaining about having it, but I can't imagine altering my body where it only comes every few months. What does that say for PMS? (PRE-Menstrual Syndrome). Do you end up having all this pent up anger and emotion until 3 months later when you actually do get your period? At least each month you get to unleash. I'm sure when the time comes, the user of this birth control just EXPLODES!!!! On the defense of having your period monthly, at least it's a quiet or quieter storm rather than a friggin tornado destroying everything in site.
It's obvious that I am terribly annoyed and inconvenienced with having my period. But I have to say..some of the worst days of my life have been when I went to the bathroom and said to myself "SHIT, I don't have my period yet!??!"
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Cold Stone Ice Cream is just Stone Cold
OK, I'll admit it..I'm a coupon junkie. I don't necessarily cut coupons for stuff I don't buy anyway, but when I see an Internet deal where you get stuff just for signing into the website, I fall for it. Every time. Recently I saw an advertisement that if you go to Cold Stone Ice Cream's website and enter your information you will get a coupon for a free ice cream on your birthday. Whew Hoo! Free ice cream! Where do I sign??
For those of you who are not familiar with Cold Stone: it's not like a Dairy Queen, Carvel or Friendly's. This is not an ice cream place for the middle class. It's the upper echelon of ice cream. Though there is nothing particularly fancy about it.. I mean, they mix in your choice of ingredients such as almonds, brownies, cookie dough, candy, etc..but big deal. For a family of four such as mine, you really need to take out a mortgage to buy ice cream there. And that's for the "Like it" (small) size. I actually would only go to the place when my teenage neighbor worked there and he would accidentally forget to charge me the correct amount. Not only does he no longer work there but the local franchise closed down.
Anyway, my birthday rolls around and I get an email from Cold Stone. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY STACEY!!! CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE ICE CREAM!!!" I am so excited, I don't waste any time and I immediately click away. Who cares if I was at work at the time? At least I know the coupon will print here. If I wait to get home to print I'll probably find out that I'm out of ink because my five year old insists on "coloring" on the Noggin web page and printing every single friggin creation she makes. I cannot take that chance. I click on the link, ignore the disclaimer and hit "I Agree". I guess I should have read the disclaimer because apparently Cold Stone is very serious and stingy about their coupons.
First, they make me choose a location. Not just the state or county I live in but I actually have to pick which Cold Stone I want to go to for my free ice cream. At first I thought that was weird because though there is a Cold Stone within 10 miles from my house, what if I'm traveling or visiting a friend and I want to go to that Cold Stone? Then my husband explained that they probably do that because it's a franchise and individually owned. OK, it's annoying but I'll let them have that point.
I then print the coupon and stick it in my purse for safekeeping. My birthday was on a Friday this year and also being the first weekend of summer it was a very, very hectic weekend. On Monday I actually look at the coupon and I'm sooo disappointed. It expires on Friday! They only gave me a week to get my ice cream! What a douche move! It's kind of like wining a free vacation and then finding out you can only go on February 29th and only the first night is free, not the entire vacation. You were sucked in and then denied!! I know you know this feeling. It's happened to the best of us. Now granted, I could go to Cold Stone that night. But I have two little ones. I get home from work at 6, and if I go get ice cream after dinner, they will be bouncing off the wall and will NEVER get to bed! By the way, the 3 year old goes to bed at 7:30..not much time to squeeze in to begin with.
At the last moment on Friday I decide to take the kids and go to Cold Stone for my free birthday ice cream. It's Friday, they can stay up a little later and I justify everything because, really, I want my God Damn free ice cream. I figure since I'm cheap, I'll get the large size and the three of us will share. I read the coupon on the way there (don't worry, my husband was driving), and I notice that the coupon is for the "Like It" size only! Douche move #2. COME ON! It's my birthday! They can't splurge and give me the "Love It" or "Gotta Have It" size? That's just so cheesy. So now this free ice cream is going to cost me money because I have to buy my kids their own ice cream instead of sharing.
So I was joking with my husband and I say "OH, they will probably ask for I.D. too". Well, guess what? On the bottom of the coupon it states that I should be prepared to show identification. I SWEAR ON MY LIFE! Don't believe me? Get a coupon. See for yourself. So ridiculous! Do they really care that much if Stacey doesn't use her free ice cream and gives her coupon to Stephanie to use instead? Is it really that big of a deal?? It's ice cream, not a bank withdrawal. In case you are curious, they didn't make me show id, but they DID make me complete a form and sign it. Cold Stone should really stop taking this birthday coupon so seriously. If they have such strong concerns with the size, time limit and the actual birthday person, then they should probably just not offer the coupon to begin with.
For your reference, I also received two other birthday promotions from franchised restaurants. Wendy's was the nicest about it. I got a dollar off of my purchase. I believe there was an expiration date (didn't use the coupon but the thought was nice). No other strings attached. YEAH FOR WENDY'S! Subway gave me a buy one get one free. That really friggin pissed me off. Why? First of all, it reminded me that absolutely NOBODY invited me out for lunch on my birthday. So, that made me feel like a big loser. Not only am I a feeling sad and lonely because nobody invited me out for lunch on my birthday, but I couldn't even use the coupon because I had to buy one to get one free! Seriously, I'm not going to buy two sandwiches and two drinks just so I can use the coupon? Geez!
So folks, learn from my mistakes. Nothing is free..and if it is free you're gonna pay for it some way or another. Perhaps the REAL lesson is to stop signing up for free food. My heart is saying YES but my ass is saying NO!
For those of you who are not familiar with Cold Stone: it's not like a Dairy Queen, Carvel or Friendly's. This is not an ice cream place for the middle class. It's the upper echelon of ice cream. Though there is nothing particularly fancy about it.. I mean, they mix in your choice of ingredients such as almonds, brownies, cookie dough, candy, etc..but big deal. For a family of four such as mine, you really need to take out a mortgage to buy ice cream there. And that's for the "Like it" (small) size. I actually would only go to the place when my teenage neighbor worked there and he would accidentally forget to charge me the correct amount. Not only does he no longer work there but the local franchise closed down.
Anyway, my birthday rolls around and I get an email from Cold Stone. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY STACEY!!! CLICK HERE TO GET YOUR FREE ICE CREAM!!!" I am so excited, I don't waste any time and I immediately click away. Who cares if I was at work at the time? At least I know the coupon will print here. If I wait to get home to print I'll probably find out that I'm out of ink because my five year old insists on "coloring" on the Noggin web page and printing every single friggin creation she makes. I cannot take that chance. I click on the link, ignore the disclaimer and hit "I Agree". I guess I should have read the disclaimer because apparently Cold Stone is very serious and stingy about their coupons.
First, they make me choose a location. Not just the state or county I live in but I actually have to pick which Cold Stone I want to go to for my free ice cream. At first I thought that was weird because though there is a Cold Stone within 10 miles from my house, what if I'm traveling or visiting a friend and I want to go to that Cold Stone? Then my husband explained that they probably do that because it's a franchise and individually owned. OK, it's annoying but I'll let them have that point.
I then print the coupon and stick it in my purse for safekeeping. My birthday was on a Friday this year and also being the first weekend of summer it was a very, very hectic weekend. On Monday I actually look at the coupon and I'm sooo disappointed. It expires on Friday! They only gave me a week to get my ice cream! What a douche move! It's kind of like wining a free vacation and then finding out you can only go on February 29th and only the first night is free, not the entire vacation. You were sucked in and then denied!! I know you know this feeling. It's happened to the best of us. Now granted, I could go to Cold Stone that night. But I have two little ones. I get home from work at 6, and if I go get ice cream after dinner, they will be bouncing off the wall and will NEVER get to bed! By the way, the 3 year old goes to bed at 7:30..not much time to squeeze in to begin with.
At the last moment on Friday I decide to take the kids and go to Cold Stone for my free birthday ice cream. It's Friday, they can stay up a little later and I justify everything because, really, I want my God Damn free ice cream. I figure since I'm cheap, I'll get the large size and the three of us will share. I read the coupon on the way there (don't worry, my husband was driving), and I notice that the coupon is for the "Like It" size only! Douche move #2. COME ON! It's my birthday! They can't splurge and give me the "Love It" or "Gotta Have It" size? That's just so cheesy. So now this free ice cream is going to cost me money because I have to buy my kids their own ice cream instead of sharing.
So I was joking with my husband and I say "OH, they will probably ask for I.D. too". Well, guess what? On the bottom of the coupon it states that I should be prepared to show identification. I SWEAR ON MY LIFE! Don't believe me? Get a coupon. See for yourself. So ridiculous! Do they really care that much if Stacey doesn't use her free ice cream and gives her coupon to Stephanie to use instead? Is it really that big of a deal?? It's ice cream, not a bank withdrawal. In case you are curious, they didn't make me show id, but they DID make me complete a form and sign it. Cold Stone should really stop taking this birthday coupon so seriously. If they have such strong concerns with the size, time limit and the actual birthday person, then they should probably just not offer the coupon to begin with.
For your reference, I also received two other birthday promotions from franchised restaurants. Wendy's was the nicest about it. I got a dollar off of my purchase. I believe there was an expiration date (didn't use the coupon but the thought was nice). No other strings attached. YEAH FOR WENDY'S! Subway gave me a buy one get one free. That really friggin pissed me off. Why? First of all, it reminded me that absolutely NOBODY invited me out for lunch on my birthday. So, that made me feel like a big loser. Not only am I a feeling sad and lonely because nobody invited me out for lunch on my birthday, but I couldn't even use the coupon because I had to buy one to get one free! Seriously, I'm not going to buy two sandwiches and two drinks just so I can use the coupon? Geez!
So folks, learn from my mistakes. Nothing is free..and if it is free you're gonna pay for it some way or another. Perhaps the REAL lesson is to stop signing up for free food. My heart is saying YES but my ass is saying NO!
Friday, July 2, 2010
Gender Equality can go SUCK IT!
All I have to say is: I would give up a limb to hear my husband say "NO WIFE OF MINE IS GOING TO WORK!!!" Aahh, I can only dream.
I'm sure the bra burning women in the 60's and 70's thought they were doing the right thing. I'm sure they had no clue on how much this would backfire. It's kind of like pulling over on the road to help a stranded motorist and he turns around and robs you instead. The good intentions were there. It just didn't work out as planned.
Right now, this very second, I could be home, cooking dinner, maybe cleaning. But instead, I'm at work, (By the way, my job is not blogging or related in any way to creative writing) - which tells you how devoted I am to my job. Now, because women felt the strong desire to be equal to men..my life sucks...BIG TIME.
If women didn't fight so hard for equal rights:
1. I would not have the right to vote. Who gives a fuck? Anyone who has ever run for a political office has been a liar, has cheated on his spouse and generally cares more about notoriety rather than the state of the economy or public safety. The rule is get re-elected, not cure the problems. Kind of like prosecutors: they only care to get the "win" not that the defendant has actually committed the crime. Having the right to vote makes my life even harder. I now have to keep up with current events. If I go out for dinner with another couple, I have to be intelligent enough to keep up with the conversation if it turns to politics. That means that after working, cooking dinner, giving baths, etc, I now have to read the newspaper or stay up to watch the 11:00 news when I would much rather go to sleep. It would have been so much easier if when the topic turned to politics, I could turn to the wife and talk about recipes instead. But no, we have to be equal.
2. In the 1950's women were expected to have either looks or brains. Now we are expected to have both. That's putting a lot of pressure on us. We are expected to juggle work and have social lives. If it weren't for gender equality, I could either work AND not have a family and society would say, "well, she's not a looker so she has to put her effort into a job. No man is going to support that ugly mug". OR if I didn't have a job, it would be acceptable because I would have the husband and family. I would have the time to stay home, rest and put myself together before my husband came home from work. But Nooo, we have to have equality. So now after working all day, I am expected to still look refreshed and put together. Please.
**This reminds me of a funny story which is absolutely 100% true. I know I'm digressing but I must tell it**
I was in the hospital after just giving birth to my first child. As the labor came unexpectantly and quickly, my husband was home that first morning getting stuff ready. I'm in bed and the baby is in the plastic cradle next to me. Anyway, visiting hour was approaching and I assumed relatives would be coming. A nurse walks in and tells me that I should take a shower. I tell her that since the baby is in the room, and visiting hour is starting..it probably would not be a good idea to leave the baby unattended while I take a shower. I mean, first day with the baby and I'm already neglicting her? Is this a test? I explain that my husband will be here later and that is when I will shower. She came in one more time and made her suggestion about showering. Then, about 20 minutes later she comes in and says to me, "You know, you should really make it a point to look nice for your husband. You shouldn't stay in your pajamas all day." IS SHE INSANE??? I HAVE A FUCKING VILLAGE IN MY UNDERWEAR AND SHE IS TELLING ME TO LOOK NICE FOR MY HUSBAND??? I'm sure if a baby just squirted out of his penis hole, he would not be so quick to freshen up for me. OK, end of story.
3. Many feminist would argue that because of gender equality we now have more rights when it comes to maternity leave. Our position is saved for us, we get paid a portion of our salary and even extended time off. Ummm, duhhh! You wouldn't have to fight for this stuff if we didn't have to go back to work in the first place. 'Nuff said.
4. Instead of equality we have INequality! Seriously. Great, so we get equal pay for equal jobs. But what about when we get home? Is division of labor split any different? In most cases I would say no. Not saying that every wife does more in the household than her husband..but women are still expected by society to still have the same roles. Child rearing, maintenance, grocery shopping, event planning, etc. I have to cram my "chores" into the hours of 6 pm (when I get home) and 10 pm (my target bed time). If I was home all day I could pace myself. But no, we have to be equal.
5. If it weren't for gender equality, I would have a seat on the subway! Not that I travel the tubes often but I do not recall any time where a man got up from his seat and offered it to me or any other standing female. I can just see the wheels turning in the heads of men. "OH, you want equal rights, huh? Well, equally stand up the entire train ride, bitch." This particularly hurts me because I am not the most coordinated person. Also, I am short. This means I cannot utilize the bar over the seat and I must fight for a spot at the vertical pole. The train moves and I fly all over the place. I'm constantly rethinking my footing strategy so I don't fall on my face. I could have had a seat..but NO, we have to be equal.
The intent of Women's liberation was to eliminate forms of oppression based on gender and to gain for women equal economic and social status and rights to derermine their own lives as are enjoyed by men. I say, oppress me, keep me home, keep me pretty, don't make me think to hard, let me work at a leisurely pace and give me my fucking seat back!!
I'm sure the bra burning women in the 60's and 70's thought they were doing the right thing. I'm sure they had no clue on how much this would backfire. It's kind of like pulling over on the road to help a stranded motorist and he turns around and robs you instead. The good intentions were there. It just didn't work out as planned.
Right now, this very second, I could be home, cooking dinner, maybe cleaning. But instead, I'm at work, (By the way, my job is not blogging or related in any way to creative writing) - which tells you how devoted I am to my job. Now, because women felt the strong desire to be equal to men..my life sucks...BIG TIME.
If women didn't fight so hard for equal rights:
1. I would not have the right to vote. Who gives a fuck? Anyone who has ever run for a political office has been a liar, has cheated on his spouse and generally cares more about notoriety rather than the state of the economy or public safety. The rule is get re-elected, not cure the problems. Kind of like prosecutors: they only care to get the "win" not that the defendant has actually committed the crime. Having the right to vote makes my life even harder. I now have to keep up with current events. If I go out for dinner with another couple, I have to be intelligent enough to keep up with the conversation if it turns to politics. That means that after working, cooking dinner, giving baths, etc, I now have to read the newspaper or stay up to watch the 11:00 news when I would much rather go to sleep. It would have been so much easier if when the topic turned to politics, I could turn to the wife and talk about recipes instead. But no, we have to be equal.
2. In the 1950's women were expected to have either looks or brains. Now we are expected to have both. That's putting a lot of pressure on us. We are expected to juggle work and have social lives. If it weren't for gender equality, I could either work AND not have a family and society would say, "well, she's not a looker so she has to put her effort into a job. No man is going to support that ugly mug". OR if I didn't have a job, it would be acceptable because I would have the husband and family. I would have the time to stay home, rest and put myself together before my husband came home from work. But Nooo, we have to have equality. So now after working all day, I am expected to still look refreshed and put together. Please.
**This reminds me of a funny story which is absolutely 100% true. I know I'm digressing but I must tell it**
I was in the hospital after just giving birth to my first child. As the labor came unexpectantly and quickly, my husband was home that first morning getting stuff ready. I'm in bed and the baby is in the plastic cradle next to me. Anyway, visiting hour was approaching and I assumed relatives would be coming. A nurse walks in and tells me that I should take a shower. I tell her that since the baby is in the room, and visiting hour is starting..it probably would not be a good idea to leave the baby unattended while I take a shower. I mean, first day with the baby and I'm already neglicting her? Is this a test? I explain that my husband will be here later and that is when I will shower. She came in one more time and made her suggestion about showering. Then, about 20 minutes later she comes in and says to me, "You know, you should really make it a point to look nice for your husband. You shouldn't stay in your pajamas all day." IS SHE INSANE??? I HAVE A FUCKING VILLAGE IN MY UNDERWEAR AND SHE IS TELLING ME TO LOOK NICE FOR MY HUSBAND??? I'm sure if a baby just squirted out of his penis hole, he would not be so quick to freshen up for me. OK, end of story.
3. Many feminist would argue that because of gender equality we now have more rights when it comes to maternity leave. Our position is saved for us, we get paid a portion of our salary and even extended time off. Ummm, duhhh! You wouldn't have to fight for this stuff if we didn't have to go back to work in the first place. 'Nuff said.
4. Instead of equality we have INequality! Seriously. Great, so we get equal pay for equal jobs. But what about when we get home? Is division of labor split any different? In most cases I would say no. Not saying that every wife does more in the household than her husband..but women are still expected by society to still have the same roles. Child rearing, maintenance, grocery shopping, event planning, etc. I have to cram my "chores" into the hours of 6 pm (when I get home) and 10 pm (my target bed time). If I was home all day I could pace myself. But no, we have to be equal.
5. If it weren't for gender equality, I would have a seat on the subway! Not that I travel the tubes often but I do not recall any time where a man got up from his seat and offered it to me or any other standing female. I can just see the wheels turning in the heads of men. "OH, you want equal rights, huh? Well, equally stand up the entire train ride, bitch." This particularly hurts me because I am not the most coordinated person. Also, I am short. This means I cannot utilize the bar over the seat and I must fight for a spot at the vertical pole. The train moves and I fly all over the place. I'm constantly rethinking my footing strategy so I don't fall on my face. I could have had a seat..but NO, we have to be equal.
The intent of Women's liberation was to eliminate forms of oppression based on gender and to gain for women equal economic and social status and rights to derermine their own lives as are enjoyed by men. I say, oppress me, keep me home, keep me pretty, don't make me think to hard, let me work at a leisurely pace and give me my fucking seat back!!
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